Lights
by retrinazambrano
Summary: It's the most wonderful time of the year but Robin doesn't feel much like celebrating, so much so he ends up in a fight. At that, he turns to the only person he wants: his ex, Regina. A holiday trilogy, written for OQ advent 2017.
1. Lights

**Lights is the main piece of this trilogy, written for OQ advent 2017, which you should absolutely check out at onceuponanadvent dot com. There's such a wealth of talent in the OQ fandom! Thanks to Shay and Lindsay for their beta-ing skills and a very merry festive season to all!**

* * *

Blinding Christmas lights, fervent carolling and a feeling of extreme merriment. That's what December is meant to be about nowadays; each passing day adding to the excitement, all to burst on December 25th, then crest into the new year, with new plans and new resolutions alike, before the ennui of January sets in.

But in Robin Locksley's world, it may as well be January. It's December 24th and he's never felt lower. He lost count of how many pints he'd had after five, of how many subsequent whiskies he'd downed when the need for something stronger struck. He is hurting so, so much, angry at his stupidity and the world at large. He gets up from his stool, swaying, knocking into someone beside him at the bar, spilling their drink. He doesn't apologise, riling the equally as inebriated man and earning himself a punch to the jaw when he can't stop mouthing off, not even able to understand his own furious babble. As security drag him out and dump him outside into the cold December air, his mind is focused on one thing and one thing only.

Regina. His Regina. Except she wasn't his anymore. Left him back on Halloween night after a post-party argument where they both said hurtful things that couldn't be taken back and she couldn't take it anymore - the spiteful words or the mindless risks he'd take with his safety both in his job and outside of it, nor the fact that they just couldn't seem to conceive a much longed for child. She'd come back to get her belongings, but despite his apologies and pleas, she was insistent it was over.

When he doesn't have her… that's when he wants her most.

He's not sure what Andy Williams was singing about. It's the damn _loneliest_ time of the year.

* * *

He awakens some time later on a soft surface, one he slowly realises is his sofa and he has no recollection of how he got there. He sits up a little too sharply and his head spins, but he pushes through as he gets up and heads to the bathroom to pee.

He stares in the mirror as he washes his hands, the water running for far longer than necessary. He's a mess. An utter mess and he needs her. Needs her caring hands, beautiful smile and gentle voice, the feel of her arms around him as he shudders over the last case to come through sleepy Storybrooke's sheriff office, the way she would just talk to him about it. When he wanted her advice, she'd try, and when he needed her to listen, she'd do so without interruption. Looking back, he realised that she soothed him far more than he did her.

He didn't realise he'd become so selfish.

Drying his hands and stumbling back into the lounge, he's at a loss of what to do. He's clearly still drunk, but he doesn't want to sleep. He sits, staring at his pathetic attempt at decorating his apartment; some cards here and there and a sad-looking tree with a single strand of lights carelessly draped over some of the branches. He'd started with the best of intentions, thinking - hoping - it might cheer him up, but as soon as he'd begun, the memories of the Christmas before came flooding back; how he held onto Regina as she placed the star on top of the tree, with a comment that that was exactly what she was to him - his star, his guiding light. No sooner had her feet hit the floor again, she'd swatted his arm and told him, with a grin and a chaste kiss, to quit being so soppy.

With a sigh, his eyes drag back over to the coffee table, his phone and a slip of paper that wasn't there before.

 _Jesus Robin, you're a liability. Pull yourself together._

It's in Little John's unmistakable scrawl. In the morning, if he remembers, he'll phone, apologise and ask him what the hell happened.

He still doesn't know what to do, so he does the only thing he knows _how_ to do; he picks up his phone, blindly fumbles through his contacts (hoping for no misdials) and finds the one person he needs to talk to, with no regard for the time.

"H- hello..?" Comes the familiar voice at the other end, croaky, laced with sleep.

"Regina? … Regina, it's me." His breath hitches as he says the one name that tastes so pleasant upon his tongue.

"Robin?" Her voice is clearer now. "Robin, it's almost midnight, I've been at work all day. You shouldn't be calling me. Couldn't it have-" She hears it then, his sobbing and her heart breaks all over again. Leaving him was a decision she'd found difficult to make and she's still unsure if it was the right one. "-Robin?"

"Sorry," he stutters, "you… you said I could call you any time and… I'm hurt, I have no idea what's happened or how I'm here and… Dear God, I miss you, Regina."

Silence, until, "you're hurt?"

"I… don't know how." He knows the bar, remembers some of the drinks, but remembers nothing of the incident that caused his lip to swell and his limbs to ache.

"Are you home?" Regina enquires, worried that he's a target in the middle of nowhere.

"Y-yes. Somehow."

"Stay where you are," she says, pulling herself up and out of bed, now fully awake, slipping on some warmer clothing as she speaks. "I'm coming over. Just let me in." She hangs up before he can respond.

* * *

She arrives twenty minutes later, pushing the apartment door open, gently calling his name to no answer. The only lights on in the apartment are from the tree and she sighs sadly at the sight of it, of the contrast of the year before, just how much their relationship took a nosedive as the year progressed. The room is bathed in a muted light and she can see he's not in the lounge, the kitchen or in fact, anywhere within her view.

That's when she notices the bedroom door ajar, so she pads over and pushes it gently, finding her beloved with his hands over his face, elbows on his knees, deep in self-loathing. Quietly, she kneels in front of him, taking one of his hands away, then the other, holding them in her own, snapping him out of his self-deprecating trance. She stands then, keeping a hold of his hands, moving to sit beside him and wordlessly, he crumples up onto her body, laying his head against her chest as she gently rubs his back, resting her head against his. He smells like a brewery, rather than his usual pine, but for now, she'll soothe him.

"I miss you, Regina," and he's sobbing again. Robin Locksley rarely cries, she knows that, but the alcohol is heightening his emotions and she doubts he'd be quite this obvious. Transparent perhaps, in his looks and actions, but not _this_ obvious.

"I know," she whispers, her fingers lightly stroking the hair at the base of his skull. "I miss you too."

He picks his head up from her breast, gazing into her kind eyes, barely able to make her out in the dim light, and God does his head feel like lead, but he leans in to kiss her, a move she rejects by turning her head, letting his lips land on her jaw.

She's not entirely unaffected, would have considered letting him kiss her if he wasn't drunk… but he is, and so, she shakes her head. "That's not what we need right now," she murmurs against his forehead. "Have a shower, okay, then head to bed. Please."

The rejection stings and his confused mind sees it as outright rejection, rather than it being situational. "What do I have to do, Regina? What do I do to get you back?"

She raises an eyebrow before giving him a smile, one that has him yearning for her all over again. "Have a shower. That's a good first step." He stares at her before realising she's serious. "I'll stay if you'd like me to. Otherwise I'll go get you a towel and leave you in peace. Just let me know you're okay."

"No," he's quick to reply, before she can even get up. "Please stay."

She nods and indicates to the bathroom, then she takes a better look at his face, illuminated by the bedside lamp. "Let me clean up your cuts." She rises, leading him to the bathroom by his hand, seating him on the edge of the bath. She gives his body the quick once over for other injuries before she rifles through the bathroom cabinet for the supplies she needs.

Regina makes quick work of it, muttering apologies when the stings smart, running her finger gently over his split lip when she's done. "It's gonna hurt tomorrow and you're gonna have a bit of a black eye." She smiles at him kindly. "Just in time for Christmas too. Still handsome to me though." The kiss she delivers to his cheek is just the gift he needs and he catches her hand again, squeezes her fingers gently, reluctantly letting their connection break as she leaves the room, closing the door behind her.

Regina sighs to herself as she hears the water start, pulling off her cardi and leggings, leaving her in her nightshirt. She'd had a feeling she'd be staying.

Heading to the closet, she pulls out a towel, then a pair of boxers, throwing them onto the bed before knocking on the glass of the ensuite door.

 _He's not gonna hear_ , she thinks to herself, so she goes in anyway. "Robin?" She hears a hum in response. "Towel's just on the heater, okay?"

He pulls the shower curtain to and she unashamedly stares at him. He's in good shape, toned and she loves his arms. They feel safe, strong and they encase her so lovingly that she feels nothing can touch her.

"Something up?" Robin asks with a grin, feeling a little more human and just a little smug.

"No, I just…" she ends lamely with a shrug. She _was_ staring, the heat in her cheeks spreading right across her face. "Enjoy the rest of your shower, I'll make myself comfortable." She shakes her head, opting to close the door behind her and head out to get some water and aspirin for Robin's impending hangover.

Regina looks at the tree again, sad. It's just a tree, she reasons, but her eyes water. It looks so bare, untouched and unloved and she thinks it's a cruel metaphor for how they both felt in the lead up to and after their split. Wiping away the single tear that's running down her cheek, she heads to the store cupboard, pulling out the box of decorations that she stashed away the previous January, and begins to rifle through, pulling out wreaths, streamers, lights, _everything_ to give this home - their home - the touch of Christmas it needs. Not a surface is left untouched as Regina works her magic, expertly placing baubles and festivity around the room.

"Regina?" Robin stops in his tracks as he takes in the sight before him; the tree now worthy of being called a _Christmas_ tree, finally sparkling with life, the lights dancing up and down the window but most importantly, his beautiful ex-girlfriend with tinsel in hand, draping the colourful material across the picture frames above his fireplace.

He's still unsteady on his feet as he bounds over to her, his arms around her in moments. She doesn't even freeze, nor protest, she simply embraces him in return, taking solace in his usual woodsy scent, eyes closing as she finally feels at home.

As they pull back to look at each other, Regina places the red garland in her hand across Robin's clothed shoulders.

"Are you feeling better?" Regina whispers and Robin nods.

"Less drunk," he notes, and quite relieved too, before looking up and over her shoulder. "The tree doesn't have a star."

She shakes her head. "I wanted us to do it together." She lets go of him, kneeling down to take the symbol from inside the box. It's Robin who drags the footstool from under the table to Regina and she steps on, Robin's hands firmly on her hips as she carefully places the star atop the tree, giving it its finishing touch. They stand there still, admiring Regina's handiwork, letting themselves be fully lost in the moment, of the wounds that are beginning to heal.

* * *

"I could do with a good night's sleep and no hangover," Robin states after they've finished putting up the last few decorations, his arms back around her waist.

She reaches for the packet of aspirin she'd left forgotten on the side and holds it up. "That's what this is for," she quips. He nods, reluctantly letting go of her in search of water. Regina flops down onto the sofa at that, staring at the tree again, the bright, flickering lights, how alive it looks. Robin sits beside her once he's medicated himself, his arm coming around her shoulders.

"Will you stay?" He asks into her hair, pressing a gentle kiss into the soft strands and although Regina thought that was the plan either way, she decides to leave it be, replying with just a simple bob of her head, before she folds her legs up underneath herself, as her arm comes to drape carefully across his middle. Once comfortable, she pulls a blanket over them both, knowing they're both watching the formation of lights before them.

Regina looks up at the clock on the mantle.

1.30am.

Christmas Day.

"Merry Christmas, Robin." She points at the clock with a gentle smile, grasping for his hand, lacing their fingers together. He whispers it back, squeezing her just a little tighter.

"I love you, Regina," Robin whispers in a voice that's barely audible, one that only Regina could hear and she twists her head to look at him.

"And I love you, Robin." Her eyes close just a moment before his lips meet hers in a careful, close-lipped kiss which carries no heat, but a great deal of affection. His cut stings, but he would rather feel the aftermath of a physical altercation than the pain of losing the woman in his arms again.

* * *

They fall asleep like that; on the sofa, cuddled into one another, Regina never leaving his side. When they awaken on Christmas morning, they exchange kisses and a promise that the day would be theirs, that the coming year would be theirs. Everything that follows is just right.


	2. Halloween, Goodbye

**Thank you to everyone who commented on my OQ advent piece - it means a lot and it keeps me writing. I present to you the prequel to Lights! This one is for Lisa, Renee, and Liz, and thank you to Shay and Lindsay who beta-ed this piece. The sequel, covering New Year, is coming soon! Merry Christmas, all.**

 **I woke up this morning and I still didn't own any of these characters... let me know when that happens!**

* * *

Regina's not really one for nervous habits, something her mother attempted to wean out of her from a young age, but today is different. Her thumbnail is jagged and rough from her constant anxious chewing as the brunette keeps glancing up at the clock. She's glad that she's not outside, for many would think she looks faintly ridiculous sitting here, blinking back tears, dressed head-to-toe in skin-tight faux leather and fur, cat ears atop her head.

It's Halloween. She and Robin were at the Nolans', all dressed up for the occasion, enjoying their first day off together in a while. With drinks in hand and good company, it was going great until the dreaded and distinctive sound of his cellphone reached her ears. Sheriff Swan needed his assistance following a robbery on Main Street and he'd told her, with a peck on the cheek and without a chance for a response, that he had to go. Of course he did; work always comes first.

She'd had the Storybrooke evening news on a low volume and all it took was a flash of red light in the corner of her eye to grab her attention. She grabbed the remote, hiking up the volume to discover that a member of Storybrooke's sheriff office had been gravely injured. Regina sat there, slack-jawed, as the report mentioned no names and only a vague account of the attack that led to such a horrifying scene.

She immediately gropes for her phone and attempts to call Robin, but the call goes through to voicemail. So she tries again and again, and again… but each time, she gets the cellphone company's infuriating pre-recorded message. She growls a little more at each attempt, eventually all but screaming a tirade of hurt into the silence before angrily ending the call.

Nothing she does shifts her mind from the one question that's driving her absolutely crazy: _was it him?_ Her rational side does its utmost to calm her down, that if he had been hurt, his partner Will would have called her at the first possible opportunity. What if, though, he couldn't contact her because of what happened? If they didn't want to worry her? _That one's going so well_ , she thinks, as her fingers crumple the cushion she's grasping.

She tries all she can think to distract herself; scouring the web for news articles on the attack (Storybrooke's such a small place that there's hardly anything reported, and those she does find are just a rehash of what she heard on the television), scrolling her social media mindlessly, a large glass of pinot grigio, another attempt to call her boyfriend. Nothing works.

Nothing works until she hears the sound of the key in the door as she's pouring another glass. He calls for her, like normal, and her ire heightens, jaw set, as she swipes her glass from the countertop and stomps through to the lounge. He's got a heavily bruised eye, blues and purples swirled around the delicate skin and Regina is fuming.

"Hey love," he says, face falling as soon as he sees her expression. "Regina? What's wrong?"

Oh, he's playing this game? "What's wrong? _What's wrong?_ Robin, have you seen your face?" She doesn't even give him a chance to reply as, conveniently, the attack is being covered right that moment and she angrily points at it. "And this! Where the fuck were you? I've been trying to call."

Robin runs a hand over his face. Not again. "Regina, I've had no signal on this godforsaken thing for hours," he replies, waving his phone before realising there are a number of missed calls and that very angry voicemail she'd left approximately three hours earlier. "I'm so-"

"No, don't tell me you're sorry," she growls, her eyes dark with anger. "You said you'd be careful."

"Careful..." he says, stepping forward, meaning to comfort her but he only gets as far as putting his hands on her biceps before she's shaking him off. "Regina, we went through this last time."

"Yes, Robin, we did, and you also promised you'd be safe."

"I was!" Robin's starting to get exasperated. "I was. I was doing my job. I don't need to justify all my goddamn movements to you."

Oh, shit. Robin regrets saying that as soon as he has, for he knows that she was just worrying. Instead, Regina looks like she's about to explode. "You _promised_ me you'd be okay," Regina's voice trembles but she will not cry, "but you've, yet again, got yourself into something! What if you have a concussion?" she asks and Robin shakes his head.

"I've been fully checked out. I got caught in the crossfire at this… it was…" he pauses. "It was Will that got hurt."

That revelation knocks a few tears down Regina's cheek. "Is he okay..?" Thankfully, Robin nods. "Good. Doesn't mean that couldn't have been you."

"Regina!" Robin calls out in a voice that she hasn't ever heard him speak in before. "It wasn't me, but my _partner_ , my _friend_ has been attacked. Stabbed. That's all you can say?" She's stunned into silence. "I can't… I can't believe you," he calls out, his voice no longer a shout but a low, gravelly tone that conveys nothing but exasperation.

"You do this all the time. You decide to really play up to that fucking legendary name and play the hero. You're not immortal, Robin. One day, I'm going to pick up that phone and find out you've been killed by some faceless criminal because yet again, you've been reckless with your life!"

It's true that Robin had been reprimanded by Sheriff Swan for his cavalier attitude in regards to his personal safety - more than once - but if he's not putting his all into this job, is he really doing all he can to keep Storybrooke safe? No.

"What? So it's okay for Will to get hurt as long as it's not me? Regina, we all have a job to do. We know that when we go out there and we catch these criminals. It's what we signed up for." Robin explains this pretty calmly, given the circumstances, but Regina's in a rage.

"I didn't sign up to watch the clock every evening to see if you made it home."

"You knew what I was when you met me," is Robin's only response.

"What if we'd had a child, Robin? What then? What if something happened to you because of your idiocy and I have to raise our baby alone… having to tell his or her father he loved his godforsaken job more than his family!"

Robin's had enough; of this day, of this stress, worrying about his friend, his wellbeing to even begin discussing hypothetical issues. "Regina, live in the real world. There is no baby," and she glares. "Of course there isn't, we can't conceive. Stop being naive. Wake up and accept it. A child isn't on the cards for us. Perhaps we're not meant to."

Her glare has become more of a stare, the blood slowly draining from her face as he utters the final nail in their coffin: "Perhaps we're not meant to be together at all." And it's not a gently spoken phrase, but a hard, grating response that has Regina stepping back, ripping off her cat ears and launching them right at his face.

He should never have said that. "Regina! God, Regina, I'm sorry, come back!" he calls, but it's too late. She has her jacket, purse and is storming to the door. "Please!"

"Not on your _life_ , Locksley. Run back to work." she spits as she walks out the door and slams it behind her.

It's Robin's turn to call, but she doesn't respond. _Karma_ , he thinks to himself bitterly, as he calls and calls for the first few days, then he doesn't bother anymore, respecting her space, as days turn into weeks and weeks into a month, the cold weather moving in as the seasons change. The only time she communicates with him is a soulless text to inform him that she is _coming over to collect her belongings_.

He tries, he really does try to apologise to her as she flits around the apartment, throwing her various possessions into boxes (David's there to help her, but he's remaining impartial in this split… someone should probably tell him that that's _not_ how _impartial_ works). He all but gets on his knees, begging for another chance, but her pride is too strong, the pain of what he'd said far too raw for her to consider. She barely says two words to him the entire time she's there.

Regina leaves the key on the table, not even bothering to pass it to him herself and closes the door behind her, a stone cold expression on her face. Her heart is breaking, but she's sure that, if she had stayed, she'd of had it irreversibly broken.


	3. New Year's Love

**A very happy new year to all! Here's the third and final chapter of _Lights_ , though who knows? I may write more in this verse again one day. This is officially my first completed fic so I'm feeling very accomplished right now! Thank you, Lindsay, like always, for reading through this, and thank you to anyone who left a review, here, on the advent website or on Twitter. It makes it worth the while to hear your feedback and keeps me writing. This is for you!**

 **Now, without further ado, I still don't own OQ... enjoy!**

* * *

Christmas had passed without a hitch for the newly-reunited lovers. Both Robin and Regina had agreed that they'd take things a little slower this time, and so the festive period, as tempting as it had been to celebrate their fresh start by spending the entirety of their days off in bed, the duo share the burden of making Christmas lunch, unwrap gifts together with little kisses and ridiculous Christmas hats and create themselves new traditions for the following year.

Christmas, of course, is followed by the New Year and Robin knows Regina hates it passionately. The year before, when they had been deciding whether to go out or stay in, Robin had asked her why she loathed it so much and although she had tried to explain, Regina, in the end, just tells him that it's a feeling, rather than something completely tangible. He tries to fathom it, put all the pieces together in his head, but it doesn't work and he leaves it, eventually deciding that sleeping through into the following year would probably be a better idea.

This year, however, Robin wants to go out and celebrate but, seeing as his relationship with Regina is still on the mend and pretty damn fragile, he's reluctant to put the idea to her, not wanting to cause her distress nor cause an argument so quickly. At least, that's what his heart is advising. His head, on the other hand, is arguing that it shouldn't matter - he shouldn't be afraid to ask his girlfriend what exactly, if anything, she wants to do for New Year. If it causes a rift, he can cross that bridge should he need to. However, it may not.

On December 30th, Robin goes with his head. They're sitting on the sofa, flicking through the channels for something to watch when Robin's phone chimes and despite Regina's pleas to ignore it, in case it be work, he picks it up anyway, chuckling at her annoyed little huff.

It's Will. He's been out of action for a few weeks following the accident at Halloween, but being due back at work in January, he wants a proper knees-up to welcome in the New Year. So he's hired out the Storybrooke function rooms at the town hall and invited his rather wide network of friends, family and colleagues. According to his text, it's going to be quite the event and Robin is eager for a couple of drinks, a dance and possibly a smooch with his beloved at midnight.

"Will's having a New Year's party?" Regina asks suddenly, and that's when Robin realises she's been reading along with him the entire time. "Is he really well enough to do that?"

Robin shrugs. "Apparently. His reasoning is that if he's well enough to go to work, he's well enough to party into the new year." Regina nods, resting her head on his arm.

"You want to go, right?" Her voice is quiet and comes after a moment of silence where she undoubtedly collected her thoughts and Robin nods. "You should go."

Normally she would have shifted away, or uncomfortably, but he notices she's done neither. "I would rather go with you," he explains. "I think it would be more fun with you."

As sweet as that does sound, Regina shakes her head. "I'm sorry, Robin, but I really don't think I'll be a great deal of fun."

He opens his mouth to protest that comment, but then thinks it unfair - he knows she doesn't like the celebrations. "Okay. But I'll be home at 1am." It's Regina's turn to chuckle then, her hand rubbing at his arm.

* * *

Despite knowing he's going to be feeling Regina's absence at Will's bash, Robin gets dressed up anyway, anticipating seeing the new year in with his closest friends. He stares into the mirror, fixing his suit so it sits straight, running a hand through his hair and, as he looks up, he realises he isn't alone.

"Blue always looked good on you," Regina purrs with a smile, walking over.

Robin can't quite believe his eyes. Regina is standing before him, dressed in a little black number, her shoulder-length hair framing her face in loose curls, her makeup perfectly understated all but for a bold red lip which Robin immediately itches to kiss off.

"You…" he trails off. "Are stunning in every way." He reaches out to run his fingers through her hair, twirling the tendrils around his fingers before cupping her cheek in his hand, her eyes closing at his soft touch. "You heading out after all then?" He asks, confused.

"Yep," she grins. "I thought I'd make you look even more fashionable by turning up with you."

Robin's jaw couldn't drop any faster at that and he just cannot stop the smile that spreads across his face. "Really?"

"Really, really. I know I've been reluctant to celebrate, but I figured, if this is a new start for us," she reaches out to adjust his suit lapels, "then maybe it won't be so bad if I try new year's this year. Especially with you around… looking like that…" Regina doesn't have a chance to finish her sentence before Robin's mouth is on hers, something she eagerly responds to, before pulling away and running her thumb over his rouge-stained lip. "Let me go reapply this and I'll be ready to go."

* * *

Will, as they both knew quite well, liked to throw himself into everything he did. Parties were no exception. They walked in arm-in-arm, gasping at the classy decor, pointing out the little intricacies, noticing how they were all required outside in the courtyard at five minutes to midnight for a special surprise.

"Wonder what that is?" Regina hums, and Robin shrugs.

"Will would not give anything away, but I bet he's gone all out if this place is anything to go by," he replies, before thanking a server for the two flutes of champagne offered to them.

"Here's to us, Regina," he says, raising his glass.

* * *

"Just as well there are no plans for us to drive home, huh?" Robin murmurs against Regina's ear as she lands her fourth glass.

"Mmm," Regina hums. "It's been a while since I felt the want or need to indulge in such things. Besides, I have to see the New Year in, don't I? Makes sense to do that a little looser." With that, she knocks back the rest of her fizz.

Robin's brows knit at that, taking the hand she raises to grab another glass and leading her out of the room. The corridor is much quieter, the hum from the party behind them, the only lighting the dim lights from the sconces on the walls.

"Oh, Robin, I was having fun in there!" Regina whines and Robin sits her down on a bench, sitting aside her.

"I haven't seen you look more awkward… ever. I'm glad you're here, I am, but we can go home if you want, sleep through the celebrations," he tries and he's nothing but genuine in his offer, but Regina shakes her head.

"No, not at all. I quite like the canapes," she smiles, patting his knee. "It's just because it's this time of year, Robin. I can't quite get myself into a new year state of mind." She punctuates her speech with air quotes and ends with a shrug.

"Why?" It's a question he's asked many times before but he's never got a complete answer. Tonight, however, seems to be different as Regina reaches over for his hand, linking their fingers, taking a deep breath.

"New Year when I was twelve. That's when my mother left me and my father." She speaks quietly, as if her mother may hear all her confessions. "I was going to ask her to braid my hair, like she did sometimes, but when I went downstairs to find her, all I saw was my father standing at the door, watching her leave. He didn't even try to stop her," she trails off. "He just stood there watching, saying nothing as I asked questions, more questions. Then when her car just… left and she didn't even spare me a single glance, I screamed." Regina's trembling now, tears running down her face, the pain as fresh as the day it happened. "I screamed until I couldn't even cry anymore. And do you know what my father did?" Robin doesn't even have a chance to shake his head before she's responding. "Nothing. Absolutely nothing. He closed the door and left me there crying in the hallway, calling for my mother."

Robin's drawn her into his arms by this point, her head turned into his neck as his fingers card through her wavy locks. "I'm sorry, my love" he murmurs, pressing a kiss into her hair. "I can see why you dislike this time of year so much." He rocks her as he speaks, letting her sob into his linen-covered shoulder.

"My father said later that he didn't stop me that day because he thought it would be best for me to let it all out. It wasn't, by the way - it just followed me everywhere until I confronted him. I see why he thought it would be best, but it doesn't mean that it was right, you know?" She takes a deep breath. "I love my dad, I do. He did his best for me. My mother on the other hand… I didn't see her for years after. She decided she'd try to reintroduce herself into my life when I was sixteen." She scoffs. "I'd grown resentful by then. I told her that she'd severed all ties the morning she walked out on me."

Robin knew that she was incredibly close to her father, but she rarely spoke of her mother. It clicks into place for him; her maternal instincts, her longing for a child that she can dote on the way her mother never did. The guilt for the things he said to her that Halloween evening weighs even more heavily, now that he finally understands why her desire to be a mother is so strong. He stands then, pulling her up, his hands on her biceps. "Regina… Regina, I don't want you to feel like that ever again," he says, assuredly. "I will _make sure_ you never feel that way again."

None of the past matters when his lips press against hers in a searing kiss that almost knocks her senseless. Regina responds in kind, the wonderful simplicity of his promise fuelling the intensity of the whole moment. Her hands frame his face as he turns and walks her towards the wall, lifting her onto a small ledge.

His mouth falls to her neck, head tipped back on a sigh as Robin's hands squeeze at her hips. "We don't have much time," he growls, voice gravelly with lust, "someone could come out here…"

"Then shut up and kiss me," she purrs, working the buckle on his belt. "God, I love you, Robin."

"I love you too," he murmurs against her skin. "And I'm going to show you how much."

He silences her with his mouth yet again, none too gently either, accompanied by his fingers dancing up the inside of her parted thighs, until he meets the fabric of her underwear. He's only spurred on by the high-pitched whimper Regina gives him, coupled with her touch over his slacks.

Robin's thumb draws slow circles against her clit, matching the speed of Regina's own ministrations before it's too much for either of them. He pushes the fabric of her panties aside and dips his fingers into her warmth and moans, murmuring in her ear just how wet she is, how he can't wait to feel her.

"Then don't wait," she murmurs against his ear, finally retrieving his cock from his pants, wrapping her hand around him, moving with long, firm strokes. "I'm yours."

No more words are spoken as Robin's hand moves to Regina's face, cupping her cheeks as they kiss and kiss and kiss, their rhythm broken only by her gasp as he enters her.

It doesn't take long, both riled up by time and the present, before they both are scrabbling at each other's skin, trying in earnest to keep themselves from calling out, but it's futile as they revel in the feel, the presence of one another. It's not long before Regina's uttering that she's close and shuddering around him. Robin's not far behind, his fingers curling hard around her hips as he lets his moan be muffled by her shoulder.

They pull back, but make no move to redress. Relaxed, they remain in place, Robin's soft kisses are dizzying and, it's only when they hear a faint yell from the hall that they're brought back to the present. Robin glances at his watch and, with a soft curse, realises that it's almost midnight.

"We better get out there, love," he whispers into Regina's ear, kissing the lobe before he pulls back, giving them both a chance to right themselves.

* * *

They sneak back into the hall flushed and ever so slightly disheveled, but they're certain they haven't been missed as they join the back of the crowd without comment.

Seems they really did make it out just in time, as the moment they step out hand-in-hand, as Will greets the crowd, thanking them for their attendance before the new year countdown starts.

From behind her, Robin links his arms around Regina, pressing her to him in nothing more than a loving gesture. "Hey, Regina?"

"Mmm?" She hums, as she watches the clock tick into the final minute of the year.

"I love you."

Regina smiles, tipping her chin down coyly as he presses a kiss to her neck. "I love you too, Robin."

There's a moment of silence as they watch the counter move into the final thirty seconds. "What's the last thing you want to say to me in this year?" Robin whispers and Regina shakes her head.

"I've already said it," she says. "Though I could ask you if I could come home properly."

"You don't even need to ask, milady. My home has always been your home. We'll talk about starting a family," he promises. "We will. No matter what route we have to take, I'll be with you through it all." He hugs her then, his head on her shoulder.

Regina's breath hitches as she flicks away a tear with a gentle scoff; she's not sure when everything fell into place, but she likes it and, as the crowd starts counting down the last ten seconds of the year, she knows that this new year could be one that she truly loves.

 _Three._

 _Two._

 _One._

Despite the cheering around them, Regina takes no notice, turning in Robin's grasp and pressing her lips to his. He's taken by surprise, but his mouth responds to hers nonetheless. They only pull away when they hear a crackle and fizz from high above them, tilting their heads up to see the firework display ringing in the new year in full swing.

A celebration of a new year of promise. Together.


End file.
